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Berachain Testnet: A Guide To A Zero-cost Airdrop
Today, we bring you the most hyped-up airdrop guide: the Berachain Testnet! Berachain is a high-performance, EVM-compatible blockchain built on Proof-of-Liquidity consensus on the Cosmos SDK. Impressively, the project has raised over $42 million in funding from VCs such as Polychain Capital, Hack VC, and many others. In this post, you will be guided step by step on how to navigate the…
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Crocodile Tears: Intro
Crocodile Tears: Index Ship: Stoner!Reader | Stoner!BTS Description: You accidentally eat brownies with aphrodisiacs in them. Even worse one of your asshole friends catch you reading smut to cope, and decides to airdrop your collection of your dirtiest fantasies to the rest of the house. Just your luck. Warnings: Dub-Con, Degradation, Humiliation, Dom!BTS, Sub!Reader, Weed (sorry it’s what helps get me in the mood to write these), Dirty Talk, Kink Shaming?, mentions of the reader being into kind of dark/taboo kinks, Jimin is incredibly mean for no reason, Reader is ridiculously horny and is good at weed Word Count: 2,397 A/N: This has now been edited and finalized which means I can get started on the first segment!
You coughed, smoke erupting from between your lips. You feel Jungkook's large hand offering a comforting (arousing) pat on your back, rubbing gently to comfort you out of your coughing fit. Damn, why'd you have to get horny when you were smoking weed? It didn't help that you were surrounded by perhaps the hottest guys on campus. Who would've thought that befriending fellow stoner, Hoseok, over a blunt in a party would lead to introducing you to his other stoner friends? Before you knew it, you guys would hang out regularly, bonding over a bong.
Today wasn't supposed to be any different from those days. You had smoked with these seven plenty of times before. Most of the time it was in Yoongi's studio apartment, practically hot boxing the small space.
Today though you guys were lucky. Namjoon's rich parents were going to be gone on a cruise for two weeks. You guys could smoke carefree in a nice ass mansion and not have to worry about the smell, as Namjoon assured you the maids would take care of it. (They much preferred Namjoon to his parents despite the weed smell assistances, probably because he's so charming. You didn't blame them. Namjoon had that old money charm, the type that would make you not hesitate to do whatever he asked.)
You guys brought bongs, edible gummies, baked goods, weed, pipes, snacks, water bottles, pens and carts- anything a proper stoner hangout would need.
Part of the reason the guys adored you so much was because you had the highest tolerance of any girl they ever met, which was very contradictory to first glance. You could outsmoke any man you met, and could brag you had never greened out despite the amount of weed you'd smoke once challenged. You could simply keep going, you were a beast, this was your talent. You were proud to say you had outsmoked each and every man in this room, earning their respect and the privilege of joining their smoking group. You weren't going to argue. You've never gotten so much free weed and attention from hot guys in your life. You were used to the attention it would bring you now for the most part. Cute girl who smokes weed? It's stoner boy kryptonite, basically your super power.
Except against one. There was one guy that definitely wasn't the most respectful to you, treating you like he barely even liked you, but for some reason you didn't find yourself minding. You don't think you'd mind it from any of these guys, but as it was, your stoner powers gave you a leg up on these guys. Most of them wouldn't dare think about disrespecting a deity like you.
That didn't mean you didn't have your moments of coughing, though. Usually you were better and holding it down nowadays, but it was a bigger hit than you were anticipating.
Jungkook pulled the bong back, face in front of yours to examine your expression. "You ok?" he asked. You look up at him, eyes locking. He's got that hooded eyes, hazy look in the eye that looked so similar to "fuck me" eyes. You didn't want to assume, though. Too many times guys told you it looked like you were giving them fuck me eyes when in reality out were simply stoned.
"I'm good," you assured, trying not to think about how good his lip ring looked. Shit, you were probably staring at it right now. You quickly turn away, feeling flushed, reaching for the plate of brownies you had pulled from the kitchen. "God, I'm having insane cravings right now, though!"
"Wait, Y/N, where'd you get those brownies?" Jin inquired, squinting down at your plate.
"In the kitchen. Namjoon said I could help myself to whatever food's there." You paused after scarfing down another bite. "Oh no, do these have more weed in them? I mean I think I'll be fine, but shit."
Jin's mouth dropped open. "Uh, no... not weed."
Your brows furrowed as you stared back at him. "What is it, then? Did you put fentanyl in brownies, Jin?!"
"God, no! Not fentanyl... aphrodisiacs," Jin sheepishly admitted.
"What the fuck, man, why'd you bring sex brownies to the party?" Yoongi laughed. "Trying to start an orgy or something?"
"No! Me and Y/N were just joking about it last time we hung out and were talking about those chocolates on tik tok that make you horny. She was like what if we all took one and saw what happened? I decided to make some myself and brought them. I didn't know Y/N was going to end up eating half of them herself!" Jin explained hurriedly, eyes glancing to you quickly for help.
"So you were trying to start an orgy!" Yoongi accused.
You bursted out laughing. "Well, that explains a lot. At least I can't overdose on aphrodisiacs. Teaches me not to let my munchies get the best of me." You turn to Jungkook, biting your lip at the sight of him. These sex brownies were really doing something to you. You're all giggly, though, from the weed. "Munch. Munchies. Do you think munches get munchies?"
"Y/N definitely seems high enough," Namjoon laughs. "Sorry you're just going to be stuck with the brownies... effects. You sure you'll be ok?"
You wave your hand dismissively. "I'll be fineeee. I'm basically horny most of the time anyways, this will be no different."
"TMI," Hoseok jokes, rolling his eyes.
You were fine.
For all of, like, ten minutes.
Once an hour had passed, you were practically wanting to jump out of your skin. You found your mind wandering off, you were biting your lips far more often than usual, your eyes weren't just blazed stupor, but full on fuck me eyes. You found yourself staring intently at your guy friends. Jimin's thick lips wrapping around a blunt, letting smoke pour out. The way he was staring back at you, almost suspicious. God, he'd probably be disgusted if we knew what sort of thoughts you were having about him. He always acted a bit disgusted by you. You eyes flitted away to his best friend next to him. Taehyung's hands gripping around the bong, elegant fingers wrapping around it, veins tracing along the middle. You wondered if he'd choke you if you asked. Wait stop. You try to keep your high mind from wandering off to dirty places and focus on what's in front of you. Jungkook's tattooed fingers as he rolled up a joint for you, doing so with such delicacy and precision. He was so careful, and was definitely the best at rolling. You sucked at it, and were grateful that Jungkook's attentive personality made him volunteer to be your personal roller. Without thinking, you bring your fingers up to your mouth, chewing on your thumbnail as you stare at Jungkook with a certain intensity.
It was Taehyung who spoke to you first. "Y/N, you good? You looking kinda zoned out, there."
You snapped out of it, hand flying away from your mouth. "Huh? Oh, sorry, I was just thinking."
"Your joint's done," Jungkook said, tatted hand offering it up to you.
"Thank you, Kookie," you grin, tussling his hair in front of you. Fuck, you wanted to grip it while his head was between your legs. You reach back, clearing your throat. "It's kind of hot in here, actually. I think I'll go to the balcony."
You hope they don't read too much into your need of absence, but who were you kidding. You were obvious.
You leaned against the railing of the balcony, enjoying the fresh air. You lit up the joint and inhale the smoke, opening your phone to distract yourself. With smut. Hey, horny brain has a one track mind? You pull up your fanfiction recommendation blog, mainly used to store your favorites and save for later, for times like these. You scroll past the stories, each depraved tag and recollection of the smut's materials not seeming like enough.
You clicked on the third story, entrenched in the words as you try to imagine the scene before you. The weed made your mind hazy. You didn't know how much time you had spent out here reading porn. The joint was already halfway finished.
You didn’t even notice the balcony door being open and shut behind you, finding yourself too engrossed in the words on your screen. Perhaps if you were sober, you’d have felt his presence behind you, eyes peering over your shoulder.
"What's sex pollen?"
You practically jumped out of your skin, squealing at the feeling of hot air against your ear. You spun around, lower back soon pressed against the railing as your space was invaded, to see Jimin, his red tinged eyes meeting yours. The one man here not impressed with your surprisingly high tolerance. Maybe because he of all people knew about deceiving appearances. He leaned in closer, far closer to you than he had ever been in the time you’ve spent with him and his friends. His chest was a mere few inches in front of yours, hands clasped against the railing beside yours, trapping you. The aphrodisiacs weren’t helping you, and you were feeling a certain type of way about having a handsome man so close to you.
"Jimin! What're you doing here?" Your heart pounded erratically in your chest, the anxiety overwhelming you at being caught.
"You've been out here for a while, the guys were getting worried about you," Jimin explained. A devious smirk formed on his lips. "Guess I should explain to them you're fine, just out here basically reading porn."
"I-I'm not-"
"Oh? What's sex pollen, then?" Jimin grabbed your phone, your reflexes too slow to stop him. He wore a shit eating grin as he watched your eyes flit between your phone and his face, unable to even process the beginning of your defeat. You were completely defenseless and stunned, not sure how to understand how he had beaten you so swiftly, or why he was particularly smug about it. You don't think he's ever smiled at you before, whether out of kindness or humor. This smile lacked both. This was a grin of enjoyment at the sight of you fussing and at his mercy. "Explain, Y/N."
You gulped. "I-It's just this like… trope.”
“Trope?” His thumb slides up the screen, the sentences scrolling by. “Seems pretty scandalous compared to your typical romance tropes. I don’t think I’ve heard of this one, before.”
“It’s more of a fanfiction trope than an actual literature trope…”
“Oh? How’s it work, then? What’s so appealing about it?” Jimin’s amused expression was in stark juxtaposition to your flushed, embarrassed one.
“U-Um… it’s w-when the person gets affected by this pollen or something in general that makes them all... needy. And they need someone to take care of it for them."
“Take care of it how?”
You huffed, irritated with his teasing. “What do you think? You already know. It’s called sex pollen for a reason, quit teasing me.”
"Oh?" Jimin quirked up a brow, obviously pleased with your embarrassment and stammering. His hand came up to your throat, and there was a hitch in your breath. "But it’s so fun.”
“No it’s n-not-“ It was hard to keep your sentences structured well as Jimin tilted your head back, hand sliding further up to your jaw, making you lean back. Adrenaline pumped through you has your anxieties increased, all to aware of you dangling halfway off the railing at this height.
“This trope of yours sounds very familiar. Taking aphrodisiacs, familiar.” His chuckle was taunting in your ear, his soft breath noticeable in the night air. “Hoping for something to happen, Y/N?”
"No, I-"
"Did you do it on purpose, sweetheart? Wanted one of us to take care of you? Put you out of your mercy and fuck you cause you need it so badly?"
You gasped at his words, his hand gripping your jaw, forcing you to look at him. Your back was still arched against the railing, and both of your hands clasped around Jimin's arm for support, afraid of both falling back and falling into him. His muscles felt so firm underneath your fingertips , and you tried not to think about how much you had missed the feeling of digits on your throat. Jimin's eyes flit over to your screen, going back to scroll through the stories you saved. He could probably feel your heartbeat against his fingerprints quicken as he delved deeper into your trove of dark and twisted fantasies. "Fuck, this is some really nasty shit, Y/N. You're into some depraved shit. Alpha/Omega? CNC? Step-siblings? Always knew you were a pervert. Bet you've thought about us gang banging you before, huh?"
His canines gleam in the dim light, taunting you. Your wide eyes met his with terror, and you whimpered in his hold.
"Fuck, Jimin, please please please don't tell them-" you pleaded.
"But how can I keep this to myself?" In horror, you watched his devious fingers tap against your phone screen, airdropping your blog of fanfiction collections to the rest of the house. He let you go, allowing you to catch your breath as he backed away from you. Fishing out his own phone, he accepted the request. He waved your own screen in front of your face, taunting you with your own powerlessness. You grab it from him, staring in horror as you see that three people accepted the airdrop. Fuck. It wasn't like you could even pretend it wasn't you, your name was attatched. The worst part is you didn't even know who accepted it, the names only being "iPhone".
You stared up at Jimin in horror, only to see his sadistic grin as he scrolls through your personal porn stash. "Don't worry, I'll make all your dirty fantasies come true," Jimin chuckled. "I’ll be a bit busy for now, though. Have to catch up on some light reading. Besides,” he turned towards the door, looking back to you with devious excitement. “You’re a big girl, I’ll let you take care of this by yourself.”
He left you alone on that balcony, gawking and trembling, wondering just what would happen if you were to step back in that house.
#bts smut#jungkook smut#Jimin smut#taehyung smut#v smut#bts fanfiction#bts#bang tan#jungkook fanfiction#Jimin fanfiction#taehyung fanfiction#Yoongi smut#Namjoon smut#suga smut#Agust d#rm smut#Jin smut#Seokjin smut
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Happy Webcomic Day! My webcomic White Noise is a labor of love--according to Procreate, this page took me 15.5 hours to complete.* Here's a look into that process!
Some other notes:
The thumbnails are done on graph paper and I script while I do them--there is no separate written script for White Noise. I usually spent a couple hours on weekends as needed thumbnailing, sometimes at a coffee shop or at home listening to records.
I then set up the file in Photoshop, so I can lay in the text and use the template I have with bleeds already set up. The text is rasterized and I shuttle the file over to my iPad via Airdrop.
The bulk of the actual work is done in Procreate, which records timelapses that I sometimes share to my Patreon. I usually spend a couple hours most nights after my day job or on the bus commuting doing this.
Once everything art-wise is done, I shuttle the file back over to my desktop to re-set in the text, add a stroke around the speech bubbles (Procreate doesn't have that took fsr) and do the resizing/exporting for web.
On Sunday mornings I get up, queue the page and write the page descriptions. I don't spend any time on the page descriptions outside of that.
Also, this process goes for the whole first arc of White Noise. I'm done with that arc (which means you can binge the whole thing I'm js!!) and am experimenting with some different methods these days, but my workflow is still generally the same.
*Some more talk about the labor (and burnout) involved below the cut:
This particular page (and most of the pages I did in 2023) took a lot longer than normal because I was heading into a burnout period that I'm still lowkey in/recovering from. It's obvious to me now in retrospect watching the timelapse here and seeing how much noodling I'm doing and how much I'm struggling with the process, but at the time I was just very frustrated generally. When I'm not burned tf out pages take maybe 10 hours max.
2023 was a pretty stressful year--lots of big life changes, uncertainty, pet death, health issues--so it's no wonder it propelled me into burnout, but it just goes to show that even the slowest and steadiest pace is not sustainable forever. I've been doing one page a week following this general process for over a decade! And I stuck to that pace because I knew it was one I could maintain. But even so, by the end of this arc I found myself working more and more slowly, not really looking forward to the work, feeling anxious about being behind, unhappy with the finished work, and extremely annoyed with myself for not being able to give it my all right there at the finish line.
I did stop for a while after the epilogue and took a more or less complete break from drawing for about a month--the longest I have EVER gone without drawing, much less working on White Noise--which did help, but these days my ability to work is...inconsistent. I should probably take another total break, but I'm reluctant. What if my passion never comes back? What if people forget about WN? It's already pretty obscure, and with the general social media collapse, it's harder than ever to get people to read my work. Now that I've left Hiveworks, WN doesn't even get the benefit of being linked to other comics (although objectively very, very few readers actually got referred to my comic that way.) And frankly, I'm also just too proud to go too long without comic updates. I've always told myself, I might not be the best artist or the fastest worker or make a popular comic, but I'm consistent. Difficult to let that go.
This is all to say that webcomics are hard. We do them because we love them, we have stories to tell, we are seized with the human compulsion to create. We spend hours of our time, almost always on top of the paying work that allows us to eat, to make something that we then give away for free. It has consequences on us that the reader doesn't often see, no matter how careful we are about it. If you ask me, webcomics deserve to be valued more.
Happy Webcomic Day! Read webcomics!
#webcomics#comics#webcomicday#webcomic day#web comix#indie comics#wn comic#white noise#behind the scenes#art process#comic making#sorry about the vertical video Tumblr would not just let me upload the video file into the post#Youtube
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Reverse 1999 Analysis: Why do people follow Vertin?
There is a common theme among arcanists in the Foundation, Manus Vindictae, and the Timekeeper's department: desperation.
Note: You'll see snippets from my other posts and Asks in here since I used them as the outline. If you have deja vu, its me not you.
Before looking at Vertin, we should take a step back and consider the world of Reverse 1999 as whole. There is a long history of humans associating arcanum with demons, evil, and witches. Humans are the majority in Reverse1999 and consider arcanists dangerous due to their unpredictability and powers. The discrimination against arcanists precedes the Storm, however as Manus Vindictae makes the Storm public, arcanists realize they have yet another enemy in a world that doesn’t want them.
With that established, we can look at each faction.
Both Manus and the Foundation use fear and hysteria to herd arcanists like sheep. The Foundation weaponizes humanity’s paranoia against arcanists while Manus utilizes the Storm for their agenda. Both factions also steal the agency and freedom of their followers.
The Foundation seeks out children because it's easier to train and indoctrinate them to die as martyrs for mankind. They provide basic necessities but they strip their martyrs of their identities and cultural backgrounds. Conformity is a way to instill control. Diversity introduces too many factors and inspires ideas. The Foundation uses lies and corruption to hide the abuse they put arcanists through in the name of humanity but they also provide “shelter”. To choose the Foundation is to choose to be a dog on a leash (unless you're human), but at least you'll be safe from the Storm and you’ll have a roof over your head. They also capture “rogue” arcanists like Regulus if they deem them dangerous.
While the Foundation parades as an important and noble cause for the peace of mankind, Manus Vindictae plays the role of “savior” for suffering arcanists. However, revenge and violence are at their core. You can even see this in their name.
Vindictae: ceremonial act claiming as free one contending wrongly enslaved; vengeance
While players usually see these extremists as evil mustache-twirling villains, it's important to look at the role they play in the bigger story. In Nouvelles et Textes pour rien we can see an example of propaganda where they airdrop resources and pamphlets near the Foundation. This is a common tactic used in real life by rebel/fringe groups. If they only caused destruction, no one would join the cause. Their acts of "kindness" are part of a bigger scheme to recruit people to their cause by playing the part of the hero. “You don’t bite the hand that feeds you," encapsulates this mindset. They must bring people to their side to raise an army and grow support for their war against humanity. They will provide the desperate with food and shelter. In return, the arcanists must fight in the name of revenge. Then they brainwash them to take away their agency. However the fear of the Storm and the discrimination against arcanists make them one of the few viable options for arcanists seeking shelter from a world that despises them.
Finally, we can look at Vertin. Why do people follow her?
Many of the arcanists Vertin’s recruits are cornered and don’t have many options to begin with.
Regulus recognized the fact the Foundation would chase her down no matter how much she runs, which isn’t the freedom she wants. Jessica is scared of isolation and rejection from the outside world. Joshua is a troublemaker who doesn’t conform and suffers consequences. These arcanists already have a motive/reason to follow her. Another thing to consider is what would happen if they did not? They would be stuck in their current situations for who knows how long. Vertin gave them a way out.
Another important tidbit is Vertin’s approach. In the most simple terms, Vertin listens to people. Unlike the other factions, Vertin hears people’s concerns and addresses them directly. She isn’t herding them with lies or manipulating them with fear, she finds the source of their troubles. She does not make false claims and outright admits she will do what is in her power.
Examples: She wanted to understand Schneieder’s anger and reason for obeying Forget-Me-Not even while under fire. She appealed to Regulus’s love of freedom and appeased Jessica’s fear of rejection by the world. She recognized Druvis’s grief and tried to show her a glimmer of hope.
It’s important to recognize each character’s decision and situation instead of giving all the credit to Vertin. She should be receiving credit for her empathy and understanding of the situation, but not the final decision the arcanist made.
Unlike Manus and the Foundation, she genuinely wants to save people like the other factions claim to do. She’s proven it from her scheme with Regulus after Sonetto appeared in the Suitcase and when she tried to fulfill people’s wishes in Tender is the Night. In comparison, you had the corrupt Foundation taking bribes in Chicago and Forget-Me-Not blowing up people’s heads. Also, Her allies witnessed her and Schneider sacrifice themselves in order to slow Druvis down so the others could escape. Sotheby, Druvis, Sonetto, and their men all witnessed this sacrifice. If we look back in the story, we can see Vertin's selfless acts are done in the presence of others, meaning they know more than just talk.
Vertin is a girl, not an institution. She still depends on the Foundation. She was an insignificant piece of a larger machine where her only job was to record the end of eras. However, she earned very powerful allies because she cared about their wellbeing. Suddenly, the Foundation gave a damn. They were unsettled by her little army.
Vertin is only as strong as the people behind her and her crew took that risk. They chose to stay with her and fight for her because she fought for them too. Vertin was trying to keep them under her protection instead of letting the Foundation have their way, which is the conversation she had with Madam Z.
Later, Constatine ordered to have her held hostage in a coma and her legs bruised for good measure to hinder Vertin's efforts. Luckily she had Madam Z and Sonetto to pick up her baton.
Vertin is the hero in the player's eyes but in the larger picture, she’s a girl who dared to care too much in an unforgiving world. This is why I believe the crew needs more credit because they are not only fighting for their freedom, they want to enjoy it with the person who gave it to them. Dare say, they have their own motives and compassion. They made these informed decisions on their own so it's not fair to attribute everything to Vertin being a charismatic cutie pie (but she totally is and I get how it's easy to overlook their contributions since we see most of the story through Vertin’s eyes).
#reverse 1999#vertin#analysis#vertin is my beloved#but i dont want her to overshadow her crew#they are just as important#since at the end of the day they make the call
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so hey, question! i've been wanting to start learning how torrent(ing?) works so i can take screenshots and make gifs easier (i miss making precure gifs so bad), but i have genuinely no idea how any of that kinda stuff works. would you maybe have a guide or explanation thingy that i could check out? i think i maybe remember seeing you post one a while ago but i can not find it for the life of me. i'm planning on getting stuff from nyaa.si if that helps?
sorry if this is a weird question and dont feel obligated to answer if you don't wanna! <3
Hello @wazzuppy!
Here is my guide on piracy in general. It includes links on guides on how to torrent, VPNs to use, sites to use, etc, so I think you're set!
I will narrow things down and make it more specific for you though:
Here is the guide on torrenting (the act of torrenting itself is easy btw, literally all you have to do is click a button and it pretty much does the work itself lol. It's getting the right VPN, finding torrent sites, avoiding bad torrents [which won't be an problem on Nyaa or other legit sites] that's the issue)
For VPNs, if you plan on using a VPN exclusively for torrenting I recommend going with Mullvad. Mullvad is not going to let you stream from other countries on Netflix or whatever, and it's so strong that I can't even use Airdrop on my Mac when it's active. However, it's by far the most secure VPN for torrenting you can use. DO NOT use highly advertised VPNs like NordVPN; I used Nord and I got busted by my ISP multiple times even though I had it active. Stuff like NordVPN and SurfShark is fine for doing stuff like streaming Netflix, but for torrenting, you really need a VPN that's exclusively dedicated to protecting you from your ISP finding out what you're doing. Another VPN that is recommended is AirVPN, which still uses port-forwarding (I don't really know what that means but a lot of heavy-duty torrent users find it important).
For the torrent client itself, I recommend qBittorrent. It's an excellent torrent client, especially for beginners thanks to its user-friendly interface.
Also, just a note, Mullvad will be $5 a month (AirVPN has multiple price points depending on how long you want to sign up for) while everything else is free. But you definitely don't want to skimp on a VPN, trust me.
Let me know if you have any other questions! :)
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Shark in the UK 🦈
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Hi everyone,
As you might have noticed I was pretty silent since my arrival in the UK. I must admit that I have been through a lot of stress and changes in a very short amount of time and it's only now that I'm finally getting used to this new situation. Below you'll find a detailed post of my adventures so far, so if you are not interested you can simply ignore this and just keep in mind that I'll be returning to my posting schedule and fan-fictions very soon. For those who are curious, fasten your motherfucking seat-belts.
While I'm not an organized person I become one when I have something important planned so I was so well prepared for this journey that I was convinced I was safe from any misadventures... How wrong I was. I was barely done with the security controls at the airport when I realized they literally broke my phone's screen. I don't know if they bumped it or not but they broke it. The same phone in which I had my boarding pass. It obviously happened the only time I didn't print my plane tickets as I usually do. :) Fortunately, my best friend had lent me his old iPhone minutes before "just in case". I managed to airdrop my boarding pass on the second phone and took the plane without trouble despite the flight being delayed by one hour.
Upon my arrival in UK, I took a taxi to the hotel and had a nice time alone. I brought myself to the restaurant and peacefully slept, getting psychologically ready to meet my host family, and oh boy. This is... Something.
When I heard the word "host family" I imagined it to be an actual family, and a bit like when you're an au pair. Retrospectively, it's completely stupid because it was never written but idk my mind went full "ok I'll live with a local family". What a surprise it was when I knocked at the door and was welcomed by one lonely man and the very acrid smell of cigarettes that jumped at my face! While my host dad (@rysko @red-riding-wood @kittenonpluto pimp nickname they said) was extremely nice and welcoming, the more he showed me around the more my face dropped. I wasn't going to spend months in a local family but in an old house more or less laid out like a hostel. A hostel with a strong cigarette smell almost everywhere, five other girls, one dude, and dirt. The differences between my expectations and reality were huge and, as you can imagine, the pill was difficult to swallow. I swear when he opened the door I was this close to run away lmao.
Between my accommodations and the new rhythm of the international school I'm studying in, my mind went completely foggy for a few days. I didn't know what to think or what to feel anymore. Worse, I didn't know if my money was well-spent or if I just got scammed. Now, read what follows before you call me "ungrateful" or "princess-like".
It’s not what I got that made me feel bad, but rather the stupid and nonsensical expectations I had in mind. Then, I slowly realized that it wasn't because I hadn't expected it and that it couldn't be fun. Maybe it had a lot to do with how nice the five other girls and the people at my school are, but I started // I am starting to really enjoy it. The house might be old and not "that clean" (or at least not as clean as I'm used to), but the host dad is lovely, cooks for us every day, we have fast wifi, are close to the school, we have a key and are free to come and go as much as we want without a curfew, and the bedrooms, as well as the toilets, are clean. To be honest, some students have it really worse. I mean, I'm talking about students having to sleep in a room crowded with 7 people, or having to sleep on a mattress on the ground, the host family asking them to buy and cook their own food to the extent of some even locked the kitchen's door at night to avoid the student snacking/stealing food at night. Or students who are on 1 hour of bus-trip long from the school — those conditions I find absolutely disgusting for the extremely expensive price the students have to pay for this language exchange. With everything said, I consider myself lucky despite the cigarette smell and the "clean but not really clean" house.
As I'm writing this, it's Saturday 10 am and I can finally say it: I'm happy to be here, it's a one-life experience and I'm incredibly lucky my parents offered it to me. Unfortunately, I've caught a very bad cold and I've been sick since Wednesday: I think the combination of my emotional rollercoaster, the crazy British weather, my fatigue and half of my classroom being sick have finished me off. Now I can't wait to get better to start attending to a shitton of activities, planning trips around, and going to the pub. Also, I've got my nails done! Look at my freakin' sharp claws teehee.
Congratulations if you're still there by the way, lmao! Thank you for reading my nonsense. I'll be back very soon, both for writing and commenting, just wait for my cold to get better!
Love,
Shark.
tagging some moots: @zablife @brummiereader @emotionalcadaver @justrainandcoffee @peakyswritings @peakyltd
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3 Tips for Fanfic / AO3 Readers!
I love, love, love reading fanfic (McLennon, helllooooo).
Here are 3 ways to make your fanfic reading easier / more enjoyable since it's off the traditional publishing path:
If you love listening to Audiobooks, download NaturalReaders, upload a PDF of a fic & listen like it's on Audible. If you think you'll listen a lot, I highly recommend getting the Plus Subscription ($19/month). This is not an ad, btw, I don't get a kickback for this. But the Plus Subscription AI voices are so insanely realistic & expressive that you'll feel like you're listening to a human narrator. My personal favorite is Andrew (U.S.). If you don't want to pay, their free voices are fine - it just doesn't pass for human. (Bonus: I use this subscription for work & write it off on my taxes. Then I use it to read long/boring work docs. But duh, fanfic is the real reason I pay for it!) NaturalReaders is my favorite way to consume long fics while I'm cleaning/cooking/driving, including and especially my current fav, On Our Way Back Home. One tip, though: If you wanna listen to a particularly long fic, like hundreds of pages long, it's easier if you split it up into a couple of files before you upload it. It will load much faster and it's easier to manage since it won't have chapter markings like on Audible.
Download AO3 files on Kindle. You probably already know this - but I didn't realize, until recently, how incredibly easy this is!! Here's how: - Download the Kindle App on your phone / iPad. - Open AO3 and download any fics to read as an EPUB file. - If you've downloaded these files on your computer, airdrop to your iPhone or iPad. If you've downloaded on your phone you won't have to do this step. - Go to your downloads or whatever folder it’s saved to. - Click the file with a long hold then select to "Share to Kindle." - Make any changes you want to the title / author's name and then click upload! It'll be available on your phone/ipad in a few minutes. Just like a regular Kindle book you can highlight, annotate, change font size / color, etc. 3. Keep your fics organized on Kindle with "Collections." "Collections" are essentially themed folders on your Kindle. I use them to sort fics into categories: unread, currently reading, and favorite fics that I'm excited to re-read! I also sort based on fandom / length. So "Short McLennon Unread" or "Favorite McLennon to Reread." You could use the folders however you want, of course. One advantage of this is that you can batch upload dozens or hundreds of fics on your phone / iPad and then find which one you want more easily. I love, love, love doing this before an international trip so my Kindle is always fully loaded with hours of McLennon entertainment. Sorry, not sorry to anyone reading over my shoulder on a flight. Do you have any fanfic reading tips for me? I'd love to hear them :)
#mclennon#mclennon ao3#mclennon fanfic#fanfic#fanfiction#ao3#ao3 fanfic#archive of our own#kindle#fanfic rec
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ep 8. / ep 9. — the one with the sketch pad. / ep 10.
accept it (me), please. — lhs.
synopsis: someone would always airdrop you small messages and memes everyday, you would always accept it which made you insanely curious about who it is. unknown to you, it was lee heeseung who you considered as your high school sweetheart. lee heeseung who believes he loved you too late.
pairing: heeseung x f!reader (she/her)
content/genre: college au (ofc), glimpses of high school, second chance (ish), friends to lovers, fluff, angst, crack, slowburn
warning(s): swearing. parents being,,, yeah. tell me if i missed something.
note: this one's pretty short so expect two more updates rn. slay.
junior year, high school.
heeseung furrows his eyebrows. “why’d you stop?” he asks as he gently holds your hand and you shake your head. “come on. keep going. you were saying you don’t like freud?” he says and you chuckle.
“let’s talk about you,” you say and heeseung frowns, holding your other free hands as he holds both of them, pressing them closer.
“what’s wrong?” he asks and you shrug.
“are you not annoyed?” you ask and heeseung furrows his eyebrows even more as he shakes his head.
“why would i be annoyed?” heeseung asks. “you could recite every theory about psychology and i’d be willing to listen. i’d forget some, but i will listen.”
you pout as the corners of your mouth start twitching. “thank you.” you softly say and heeseung smiles.
“i honestly love that you know what you want to do.” heeseung admits. “i still don’t know what i would do.” he softly says and you look at the sketch pad beside him then back at him. “as if my parents would let me.”
“have you talked to them?” you ask and he hums.
“they hated it.” he softly says and you sigh. “they wanted me to get law, since i’m good at justifying how much i want to be a painter.”
you hum. “let’s not talk about it.” you softly say as you see heeseung’s mood start to go down. you move from your seat, sitting beside him. “you’ll be okay, hm?”
heeseung smiles lightly. “i know.” he softly says. “i’m with you, anyway.” you smile, squeezing his hand. “can i get a hug?” he asks and you softly mumble of course, wrapping your arms around him as he rests on you.
#enhypen imagines#enhypen reactions#enhypen scenarios#enhypen fluff#enhypen x reader#enhypen social media au#enhypen smau#heeseung imagines#heeseung scenarios#heeseung smau#heeseung fluff
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We should ban TikTok('s surveillance)
With the RESTRICT Act, Congress is proposing to continue Trump’s war on Tiktok, enacting a US ban on the Chinese-owned service. How will they do this? Congress isn’t clear. In practice, banning stuff on the internet is hard, especially if you don’t have a national firewall:
https://doctorow.medium.com/theyre-still-trying-to-ban-cryptography-33aa668dc602
If you’d like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here’s a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/03/30/tik-tok-tow/#good-politics-for-electoral-victories
My guess is that they’re thinking of ordering the mobile duopoly of Google and Apple to nuke the Tiktok app from their app stores. That’s how they do it in China, after all: when China wanted to ban VPNs and other privacy tools, they just ordered Apple to remove them from the App Store, and Apple rolled over:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/11/foreseeable-consequences/#airdropped
That’s the completely foreseeable consequence of arrogating the power to decide which software every mobile user on earth is entitled to use — as Google and Apple have done. Once you put that gun on the mantelpiece in Act I, you damn betcha that some strong-man backed by a powerful state is going to come along and shoot it by Act III.
The same goes for commercial surveillance: once you collect massive, nonconsensual dossiers on every technology user alive, you don’t get to act surprised when cops and spies show up and order your company to serve as deputies for a massive, off-the-books warrantless surveillance project.
Hell, a cynic might even say that commercial surveillance companies are betting on this. The surveillance public-private partnership is a vicious cycle: corporations let cops and spies plunder our data; then the cops and spies lobby against privacy laws that would prevent these corporations from spying on us:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/25/nationalize-moderna/#hun-sen
Which makes the RESTRICT Act an especially foolish project. If the Chinese state wants to procure data on Americans, it need not convince us to install Tiktok. It can simply plunk down a credit card with any of the many unregulated data-brokers who feed the American tech giants the dossiers that the NSA and local cops rely on.
Every American tech giant is at least as bad for privacy as Tiktok is — yes, even Apple. Sure, Apple lets its users block Facebook spying with a single tap — but even if you opt out of “tracking,” Apple still secretly gathers exactly the same kinds of data as Facebook, and uses it to power its own ad product:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/14/luxury-surveillance/#liar-liar
There is no such thing as a privacy-respecting tech giant. Long before Apple plastered our cities with lying billboards proclaiming its reverence for privacy, Microsoft positioned itself as the non-spying alternative to Google, which would be great, except Microsoft spies on hundreds of millions of people and sells the data:
https://pluralistic.net/2020/11/25/the-peoples-amazon/#clippys-revenge
Tech’s surveillance addiction means that Tiktok’s own alternative to the RESTRICT Act is also unbelievably stupid. The company has proposed to put itself under Oracle’s supervision, letting Oracle host its data and audit its code. You know, Oracle, the company that built the Great Firewall of China 1.0:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2010/01/selling-china-surveillance
We should not trust Tiktok any more than we trust Apple, Facebook, Google or Microsoft. Tiktok lied about whether it was sending data to China before:
https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/emilybakerwhite/tiktok-tapes-us-user-data-china-bytedance-access
And even if it keeps its promise not to send user data to China, that promise is meaningless — it can still send the vectors and models it creates with that data to China — these being far more useful for things like disinformation campaigns and population-scale inferences than the mere logs from your Tiktok sessions.
There are so many potentially harmful ways to process commercial surveillance data that trying to enumerate all the things that a corporation is allowed to do with the data it extracts from us is a fool’s errand. Instead, we should ban companies from spying on us, whether they are Chinese or American.
Corporations are remorseless, paperclip-maximizing colony organisms that perceive us as inconvenient gut-flora, and they lack any executive function (as do their “executives”), and they cannot self-regulate. To keep corporations from harming us, we must make it illegal for them to enact harm, and punish them when they break the law:
https://doctorow.medium.com/small-government-fd5870a9462e
After all, the problem with Tiktok isn’t the delightful videos or the fact that it’s teaching a generation of children to be expert sound- and video-editors. The problem with Tiktok is that it spies on us. Just like the problem with Facebook isn’t that it lets us communicate with our friends, and the problem with Google isn’t that it operates a search engine.
Now, these companies will tell you that the two can’t be separated, that a bearded prophet came down off a mountain with two stone tablets, intoning, “Larry, Sergey, thou shalt stop rotating thine logfiles and, lo, thou wilt data-mine them for actionable market intelligence.” But it’s nonsense. Google ran for years without surveillance. Facebook billed itself as the privacy-forward alternative to Myspace and promised never to spy on us:
https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=3247362
The inevitabilist narrative that says that corporations must violate our rights in order to make the products we love is unadulterated Mr Gotcha nonsense: “Yet you participate in society. Curious. I am very intelligent”:
https://thenib.com/mister-gotcha/
Of course, corporations push this narrative all the time, which is why American Big Tech has been quietly supporting a ban on Tiktok, which (coincidentally) has managed to gain a foothold in the otherwise impregnable, decaying, enshittified oligarchy that US companies have created.
They have conspicuously failed to call for any kind of working solution, like a federal privacy law that would ban commercial surveillance, and extend a “private right of action,” so people could sue tech giants and data-brokers who violated the law, without having to convince a regulator, DA or Attorney General to bestir themselves:
https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2019/01/you-should-have-right-sue-companies-violate-your-privacy
Instead, the tech giants have the incredible gall to characterize themselves as the defenders of our privacy — at least, so long as the Chinese government is the adversary, and so long as its privacy violations come via an app, and not buy handing a credit card to the data-brokers that are the soil bacteria that keeps Big Tech’s ecosystem circulating. In the upside-down land of Big Tech lobbying, privacy is a benefit of monopoly — not something we have to smash monopolies to attain:
https://www.eff.org/wp/interoperability-and-privacy
Not everyone in Congress is onboard with the RESTRICT Act. AOC has come out for a federal privacy law that applies to all companies, rather than a ban on an app that tens of millions of young Americans love:
https://www.businessinsider.com/aoc-first-tiktok-congress-ban-without-being-clued-in-2023-3
You know who agrees with AOC? Rand Paul. Yes, that absolute piece of shit. Paul told his caucusmates in the GOP that banning an app that millions of young American voters love is bad electoral politics. This fact is so obvious that even Rand fucking Paul can understand it:
https://gizmodo.com/rand-paul-opposes-tiktok-ban-warns-republicans-1850278167
Paul is absolutely right to call a Tiktok ban a “national strategy to permanently lose elections for a generation.” The Democrats should listen to him, because the GOP won’t. As between the two parties, the GOP is far more in thrall to the Chamber of Commerce and the rest of the business lobby. They are never going to back a policy that’s as good for the people and as bad for big business as a federal privacy law.
The Democrats have the opportunity to position themselves as “the party that wants to keep Tiktok but force it to stop being creepy, along with all the other tech companies,” while the GOP positions itself as “the party of angry technophobes who want to make sure that any fun you have is closely monitored by Mark Zuckerberg, Sundar Pinchai and Tim Cook and their pale imitations of the things you love about Tiktok.”
That’s not just good electoral politics — it’s good policy. Young voters aren’t going to turn out to the polls for performative Cold War 2.0 nonsense, but they will be pissed as hell at whoever takes away their Tiktok.
And if you do care about Cold War 2.0, then you should be banning surveillance, not Tiktok; the Chinese government has plenty of US dollars at its disposal to spend in America’s freewheeling, unregulated data markets — as do criminals, petty and organized, and every other nation-state adversary of the USA.
The RESTRICT Act is a garbage law straight out of the Clinton era, a kind of King Canute decree that goes so far as to potentially prohibit the use of VPNs to circumvent its provisions. America doesn’t need a Great Firewall to keep itself safe from tech spying — it needs a privacy law.
Have you ever wanted to say thank you for these posts? Here’s how you can: I’m kickstarting the audiobook for my next novel, a post-cyberpunk anti-finance finance thriller about Silicon Valley scams called Red Team Blues. Amazon’s Audible refuses to carry my audiobooks because they’re DRM free, but crowdfunding makes them possible.
Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg
CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en
[Image ID: A modified vintage editorial cartoon. Uncle Sam peeks out over a 'frowning battlement' whose cannon-slots are filled with telescopes from which peer the red glaring eyes of HAL 9000 from '2001: A Space Odyssey.' Topping the battlements in a row are Uncle Sam and three business-suited figures with dollar-sign-bags for heads. The three dollar-bag men have corporate logos on their breasts: Facebook, Google, Apple. Standing on the strand below the battlements, peering up, is a forlorn figure with a Tiktok logo for a head. The fortress wall bears the words 'RESTRICT Act.']
#rand paul is right actually ugh ugh ugh#politics#oracle#restrict act#privacy#privacy without monopoly#tiktok#commercial surveillance#trade war#bytedance#apple#google#facebook#meta#usausausa#generational warfare#electoral strategy#pluralistic#aoc
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FIRST OFF IM GONNA WRITE ABOUT THE LOVE OF MY LIFE WHW BARELY GETS RECOGNITION: 2p China
Full name: Zao Wang
*smol but tall
* 5'10
* looks about 25
* Nice long hair
* Wears it half up half down
* Or in a bun
* Kinda lowkey shredded
* Abs
* very attractive
* skin is usually pale in the winter and somehow always has a tan by the time summer rolls around
* for some reason I believe Zao adopts the American culture really well
* i see him thriving in San Francisco or Los Angeles
* like he’s a west coaster
* sun, beach, babes, that’s all he needs
*he loves Chinese food but he also loves trying food from other cultures
* major foodie
* also I imagine him being a gym freak but only because he uses the gym to get with girls
* he looooovesssss attention
* lowkey a whore
* Memes
* Breathes m e m e s
* his personality is insufferable
* like he can be so annoying
* On twitter 25/8
* Hyena laughs
* Nice ass smile tho
* "Psst everyone turn your air drop on."
* Airdrops literally the dumbest things
* Almost never wears hoodies
* "It's suffocating."
* loves basketball and hip hop culture for some reason
* Plays basketball really well
* you can catch him playing pick up games in Venice Beach with Allen
* Point guard
* Zao is Yao's younger brother
* Loves pissing Yao off
* He lives to do so
* that one guy who swears he knew the song before everyone else
* "I knew that song before it was cool."
* Rich kid
* Yao's his older brother so of course that's his money plug
* Drives a nice ass car even though he doesn’t deserve it
* Spends his money on drugs and name brand stuff
*C R A D L E R O C K E R
* this man loves younger women (Ik it’s weird…)
* Best friends with Allen and Lutz
* They all do illegal shit together
* they Live with each other which is complete and utter chaos
* Attends meetings but goofs tf off
* Doesn't take notes
* Gets all his work done the day before or the day it's due
* loves action movies
* rlly big Marvel movie fan
* he’s seen every single one
* I believe he’s a simp but only for the right girl
* this man takes substance abuse to the next level
*that’s all I’ll say abt that
* he’s rlly nice tho
* pls be his friend
* loves video games
///andddd that’s all I got for now. Feel free to chime in and tell me what you think or who you want to see next. I love Zao sm he’s my lil babey. But yeah see ya!!!///
#2p hetalia#2p china#zao wang#hetalia#2ptalia#hws#hetalia headcanons#2p headcanons#hetalia imagines#hetalia world stars#hetalia x reader#2p hetalia x reader#2p!hetalia#2p!china#2p america
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Crystal Fairies (good god)
Soooo in the battle between plans (a doodle for Treasure Seekers and the review for Legend of the Maze) and pure impulse (a deranged rant explaining why Crystal Fairies is bad)
Plans won wait a minute wth--
Well uh this is awkward :D
So Crystal Fairies. I've mentioned it once or twice on this blog. Specifically my crippling disappointment/hatred (? hate's a bit strong but dislike is too mild) towards it. You wanna watch me rant about why it's so painfully mid for thirty-ish minutes? You've come to the right place :D if you wanna peep the insanity yourself (despite my recommendation against it), here's an Archive copy for the mid-ness. Now without further ado, feel free to proceed below the cut to peep my insanity :D
When the book first came out on shelves and I picked it up out of curiosity, this is the first thing I saw on the back of the book:
-
Where have all the crystals gone?
The Thea Sisters are about to head off on their separate family vacations when they receive a call from Will Mystery. Once again, there is trouble in one of the imaginary kingdoms! A crack has been discovered in a map in the Hall of Roses.
The mouselets head to the Crystal Kingdom, where a dragon has been wreaking havoc all over the land. He has been turning all of the precious gems into stone and leaving a path of destruction wherever he goes. Can the sisters figure out why the dragon is destroying the Crystal Kingdom and stop him before it's too late?
-
Cool, right? I'm not gonna lie, that summary hits very hard. It slaps, even. Therefore I bought it and read it for myself.
That was truly the choice ever :D I don't regret it (my collector's ass would've regretted not buying it), but it was truly the choice ever :D
I crunched the entire thing in one sitting, and when I finished, I remember 2018!me said/thought, "that's it?"
It's... very underwhelming as a book. Like, underwhelming enough that it's the closest equivalent I have to my Malaysian friends' vitriol towards Rainforest Rescue (or rather, MIDforest MIDscue)(no it wasn't racist or stereotypical, it was just so painfully culturally mid/plain/generic/basic it pissed them off lmao). It's painfully underwhelming, and when you think about the potential and what we could've gotten from it, it would probably piss you off even more :D
An old 2018 post has described the illustrations as "like the DM has had it with the entire thing", but I'd like to argue that the entire book campaign feels like the writer (or DM in this Dungeons and Dragons analogy) ran outa ideas and slapped random stuff together with a rough approximation of assistance from a geology book to make some semblance of a coherent story.
As for the story, that's what the next section is gonna attempt to summarize without dissolving into spite :D
So finals just wrapped up and the girls are ready to go on vacay, when Will calls them through Thea's Seven Roses Unit cell (which she has in the student lounge the girls are in for some reason) to ask for help. Something something, I guess the girls weren't far enough into their vacay plans for this to be an issue because they canceled their flights and stuff almost immediately to get themselves airdropped to Antarctica for a new mission. (Wondering how that works for Violet tho, she was about to go to Europe to ride the Orient Express with her fam--)
What's the situation, you may ask? Well, the Crystal Kingdom's map in the Hall of Seven Roses looks like someone chucked a rock into it, which means shnit's going down :D and the Crystal Kingdom has sent their own SOS to the Unit in the form of a glowy opal that uses colors ✨ to portray its message.
The opal's red and faded so obviously it means things are doing really bad over there. This makes my color theory newbie ass die inside :D
Turns out the Crystal Kingdom (take a shot every time I force myself to type it out /j) is the fantasy world the SRU's database has the least intel about. As clearly evidenced by this sprawling data screen.
Okay fine there are no photos but like, this is still a lot. A lot of info that you don't really need to remember :D
The girls hop on the Magic Schoolbus TARDIS Crystal Elevator and head into the Crystal Kingdom. Their first stop? This island in the middle of bumf%$k nowhere :D
After a bit of trying and failing to roll a Perception and Investigation skill check (and a buncha smol fish T-posing to serve as an invisible barrier at the corners of the world), the squad mopes around a bit until they meet this blue fish that tells them that Joystone Castle is expecting them :0! Soon, he starts leading them down this invisible Wavy Path hidden just under the waves of the Sapphire Sea and leads to the mainland, along the way noting the strong current leading to the Stone of the Deep, a beeg magic gemstone that creates this maelstrom that wrecks things that get close to it but is also feared respectfully as some sort of creator-destroyer force of nature-- oh Violet just popped her nat1
Yeah Vi straight-up falls into the water and ends up being dragged into the current and the girls can't go and get her because duh, that's like swimming into a riptide, they ain't doing that. So the blue fish hurries off to get some help, Will gets impatient after a few minutes and dives in, instantly regrets it but is saved by the Current Carnelians (the only fish in the kingdom that can swim in that current), and soon they ratgrab Violet out of the maelstrom. Great start to the campaign :D
Anyway so first stop is the Emerald Forest, filled with some generic fae ranger McGees-- Iiiii mean Emerald Forest fairies who lead the squad in the direction of Joystone Castle while discussing the current situation. Apparently there's been a dragon flying around causing shenanigans and turning precious gems into stone with his fire, and Queen Tourmaline's been Sleeping Beauty-ed, and so far nothing has been able to wake her up. Speaking of the dragon :D
The dragon's in the east side of the forest wreckin' shnit up and turning trees into stone with fire, and the girls suggest capturing it. Capturing a fire-breathing behemoth with a trap made of flammable tree branches, with the bait being this effervescent emerald from one of the fairies that moisturizes your skin and gives it that glow to reveal your inner beauty-- (/j)
Anyway so that goes about as well as a Grass-type Pokemon trainer challenging a Fire-type gym, and one of the fairies gets KOed from it. Don't worry, she got better. After.... whatever the hell this is.
Moving on, the girls get some directions to the next stop, hear some cues and clues that the dragon "may not be as evil as he seems ✨" before being warned about the Narcissus crystals, or the Rocky Crystal Path. Oh and something about a Blue Topaz and a Lapis Falls or wutever
Anyway so the girls go to the Narcissus crystals, carefully eye Colette-- Vi why did you pop your nat1 again you already did that the first time and you're not even the ones the girls are concerned about for this bit-- make the dumb decision of putting Colette at the back of their line without anyone keeping an eye on her, and thus Colette gets Narcissus-ed and ends up straying from the path. While doing that, Colette bumps into this crazy crystal castle and this knight named Petrus. They strike up a bit of a conversation, Petrus mentions how his knight club (the Knights of the Crystal Rock) are holding down the fort in their area but weren't able to beat the dragon's ass, and then he offers to bring Colette back to the others. Also something about the dragon looking for something--
Meanwhile back with the other girls, everything is in shambles. The girls are frantic, Nicky is distraught because she was right in front of Colette (instead of behind her so I say it's sTILL kinda her fault--), but Colette strolls back over with Petrus's help and everything is fine yippee onto the Blue Topaz
The Blue Topaz has this golden needle up top that works on "no u" rules: you go one way, the needle points the opposite way. That puzzle is dealt with real quick with the help of some seabords flying overhead and onto the Lapis Falls.
The Lapis Falls has the guardian fairies guarding the secret entrance to Joystone Castle, but their gimmick is that they bathe in the falls everyday to stop themselves from "tarnishing", at the cost of losing their memories. The girls deal with that real quick with the glowy opal, and they are soon boated off to the castle's underground entrance at the... Semiprecious Stones Spring.
(You're gonna notice a pattern here, and that pattern is the names being specifically designed to give any dungeon master and fantasy writer a brain aneurysm.)
They pop into the castle, the castle staff welcome them in and explain the whole situation: apparently the dragon's been destroying enough shnit that he's made a whole-ass new biome in the kingdom, the Stone Desert, which has stretched all the way up against the castle's Quartz Wall. As for Tourmaline, none of the wise men from all over the kingdom could figure out a way to wake her up, and the castle staff just found her Peter-Griffined on the throne room floor with her fancy ruby bracelet turned to stone and the center stone of her royal scepter smashed to pieces. Said center stone is an amber "made of pure sunlight", by the way.
The girls peep them clues and think that the dragon must've been there, but uh he too beeg, how the hell did he get into the throne room and out without causing any damage? Anyway so everyone's very lost on what to do-- there's a dragon flying around destroying things and gaining power in its destruction, and the monarch of the kingdom is Peter-Griffined in bed. What do?
Look into a possible solution to wa consult Google.
There is this wise fairy named Amethyst who lives in Light Mountain (it's a big-ass hill of glowing gems) and has this giant Himalayan salt lamp-lookin' ass gem called the Query Crystal, which is basically magical Google, if you could only look up one thing once and you can't use it again. The group is sent out to go to Light Mountain and ask to consult Amethyst's Google Search crystal for advice on the situation.
Oh and if you're wondering why the castle staff couldn't go themselves, every single creature in the Crystal Kingdom has this weird gimmick where they can't leave the place they "guard" or reside in. Like I dunno, I guess they're magically condemned to the life of a couch potato. How did this kingdom survive and drive off an invasion war again--
Also this is the map of the Crystal Kingdom. Beautiful, isn't it? Cartographers in the chat, are your eyes bleeding?
The squad moves out, plays some hopscotch on a Citrine River that seems to be the only line of defense between the girls and Light Mountain, climb Light Mountain without much of a struggle, and consult Google with six questions, one for each person.
Google Search gives its answers, which are:
The dragon's name is Goldfire named after his golden scales (Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way soundin' ass) and he's under a spell from an evil wizard
Goldfire's looking for a specific gemstone and will not stop hyperfixating until he gets it
Tourmaline's under a spell from the same wizard, and the only thing that can remedy this is the Sweet Awakening Gem
DEAL WITH THE DRAGON FIRST YOU NIMRODS--
You wanna protecc but not attacc? Go to Microsoft Bing the Ancient Amber Tree, it's where the amber made of sunlight is from
You really wanna go to the Ancient Amber Tree in the Eternal Woods to get this goss my guy it's the only place you can get goss this juicy
So the girls head on over down the Night Gems Path to go down this secret tunnel, and they find the Eternal Woods. Which is obviously an enchanted woods with some wack enchanted trees that immediately ratgrab the entire squad, with this GIF to illustrate somewhat accurately what that looked like.
A Golden Elf shows up tho to amend the situation and tells the trees to put the rats down, bad tree
After that little misadventure, the girls are taken to the Golden Elves' ruler Lord Arbor, who turns out to be a (respectful) Tourmaline simp and drops his whole "the Ancient Amber Tree is very sacred I can't let you near it" shtick the moment he hears about Tourmaline's coma, to help the girls deal with the situation and stop the dragon and wake up the queen.
Bing does get some answers that Google didn't: turns out the Sunlight Amber (the royal scepter's centerpiece, remember?) was part of a pair: the Sunlight Amber and the Star Amber (no not Starlight Amber, just Star Amber. Are you crying yet?). These two are very unique... becaaaauuussseee an evil wizard trapped a whole-ass fairy in one of them :D her name is Esmeralda and she's stuck in the Star Amber.
Esmeralda is no ordinary fairy, tho. See, her fiance is Diamond, the Lancelot of the Knights of the Crystal Rock and the right hand of the previous monarch Eliodoro. This evil wizard guy managed to get to him, and Diamond was transformed into the dragon Goldfire and was trapped in the Sunlight Amber. The wizard then set it so the dragon would bust out of his gemstone prison in 200 full moons (approximately 16.1697 years/16 years and 2 days) to wreak havoc on the Crystal Kingdom, slapped it onto a pretty scepter, and gave it to the king while disguised; and the king liked it so much that he basically turned it into part of the royal regalia. And there may or may not be something along the lines of a corruptive influence that made Goldfire do the stuff he did. Maybe. (You're gonna see why I'm unsure later)
Either way, sixteen years after being trapped, Goldfire is now out and searching for the Star Amber so he can reunite with his fiance. He was last seen flying over the Desert of Rocks and Dust, a horribly dangerous place one does not simply go to without a good reason for doing so; so the girls are given a ride to go there. Oh and Will gets loaned this gold dagger that kinda works on... Caliburn/Excalibur? Mjolnir? rules?? It's totally OP and can cut through anything, but you can only use its power by being a big brave boi doing big brave boi things that would airdrop you into the Lawful Good alignment in an instant.
Literally the moment they land in the desert and their rides leave, a sandstorm scoops them up and plops them back down in another spot of the desert: an obsidian Orbeez pool pebble pit that acts like a denser ball pit. Will uses his backpack for the first time in the entire series and pulls out a rope, lassoes a nearby boulder, and gets the group out of the pebble pit.
Except the boulder he used to anchor himself and the girls to get them out was actually a Stone Troll.
The place they drop at is the Stone Trolls' pad actually, and they don't like intruders, sooooooooooooo the squad got captured and taken to their prison in the Stone Circles. (What is this, Stonehenge?)
In the prison, they meet this lil' leprechaun man named Piro, who's been there for uh, I have no idea, and he's given up trying to escape at that point because of how unbreakable these trolls made their damn prison for just in case an intruder strolls up to their pad.
Anyway Piro gives them the goss about the Dark Fairies, these morally ambiguous (cOUGH COUGH THEY'RETOTALLYNOTEVIL) girlypops who wrote too much in their diaries about just how annoying and perfect and beautiful and so damn nice and perfect the good girl fairies are that it turned them evil-ish. Apparently they just captured a dragon with gold scales, and one thing to note about the Dark Fairies is that they and the Stone Trolls feud like they're from Mean Girls.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
So the squad plus Piro come up with a plan: they're gonna pull a prank on the Dark Fairies by casually releasing their most recent catch. Piro casually chats with the troll wardens about the Dark Fairies' recent victory and suggests the idea of the prank to them, and the Stone Trolls respond by being like "okay we're gonna escort you to the Dark Caves to pull off this prank", and take them to the Dark Caves, the Dark Fairies' pad. Then they convince the trolls to hide and let them take care of the prank so they can escape their operation isn't busted right away. The trolls surprisingly comply knowing that they can trust the Dark Fairies to absolutely lose their shnit at this prank, and Piro takes that moment to escape and go back home because y'know, he's bound to his hometown for some reason.
The squad stealth missions their way into the heart of the winding caves and find Goldfire bound in thick iron cables that he can't melt or bite or claw through so he's just left to ">:[" about it. He's initially very "I DON'T NEED NO HELP DAMMIT >:[", but the girls manage to talk him into letting them help after revealing that they know about Esmeralda and the Star Amber. Turns out Goldfire is lucid and sentient, and he retains his memories as Diamond? Why does he have the name Goldfire in the first place? He's even surprised that they know his name Goldfire?? Why does he have the name in the first place??? Why was he destroying the Crystal Kingdom in the first place when he was awake and aware of what's going on and had control over what he was doing????
clears throat ANYWAY the squad needs to get Goldfire out without the Dark Fairies stepping in and potentially capturing the squad too, so the plan is Nicky, Pam and Colette aggro the three Dark Fairies to kite them around their own caves; while Paulina, Violet and Will stick around to put a dent into Goldfire's restraints. Will takes a minute or two to figure out how to use the gold dagger, which he does figure out eventually. Colette, Pam and Nicky do end up getting captured (fr being able to fly as a fairy in general is busted in field coverage </3 /j), but Will manages to get the job done in time for Goldfire to fully bust out. The Dark Fairies lose their shnit, try and fail to re-restrain him, and realize that there're three more rats in their caves that they gotta deal with.
Violet I swear to god these fairies literally have obsidian spears and flails this is a nat1 you can't afford to roll-- Will do something please Vi's about to dieded boi-- Will accidentally trips and drops the gold dagger by accident.
Which turns out to be a good thing, because the moment the Dark Fairies peep the gold dagger, they immediately back down and pledge neutrality (or allegiance, whichever you prefer). Turns out that in Crystal Kingdom politics, Arbor is the gigachad-est of gigachads, and the gold dagger is like, a call card of his almost, so the Dark Fairies are not gonna be messing around with an ally of Arbor that managed to get his gold dagger. The fairies allow them to leave with Goldfire, and the squad flies out on Goldfire's back, yippee!
Goldfire flies the squad over to this white desert where this Circle of Intense Light can supposedly break any and every curse that anyone happens to be unfortunately saddled with. Why didn't he go there right away? Well, he was looking for the Star Amber, where Esmeralda is.
Speaking of which, he has the amber with him. He found it in the Swamp of Forgotten Dreams, the most dangerous and evil place in all of the Crystal Kingdom, and was actually on his way to the Circle when he got dragon-ratgrabbed by the Dark Fairies. Soooooooo he goes into the circle of light with a bit of emotional pep talk from Paulina, and out of the circle emerge Diamond and Esmeralda, uncursed and put back into their normal forms, YIPPEEEEE
So that's the dragon dealt with. Seems like we're all done here, right?
NOPE WE STILL GOTTA GET THAT SWEET AWAKENING GEM FOR THE QUEEN
Now here's the part of the book called "power of friendship incarnate exposed", where Esmeralda proves that she is literally the most overpowered character in the entire series. Need to go to the Jade Jungle and consult the gem's guardian Fang the massive wolf? No worries, Esmeralda actually met him as a smol child and they became close friends! Need to do a trial to prove themselves where they have to go into the Ruby Caves' labyrinth to borrow the fabled Blood Ruby from the Ruby Fairies living in the caves? Don't sweat it, the shy Ruby Fairy they meet and Esmeralda actually have some history together, and the fairy (her name is Rubix btw) decides to help the squad through the labyrinth and get the Blood Ruby to go! Complete with a free ride back to the Jade Jungle! How nice!!
Yeah Esmeralda let them breeze through this last bit of plot.
As for Diamond, man was lowkey angsting about the destruction he caused as Goldfire, and Nicky, Pam and Violet reassure him that it wasn't entirely his fault and he can make things right now.
By climbing a beeg shiny tree to collect an Alabaster Fruit for their trial. Cool redemption arc Diamond, you've got this 👍
The squad plus the lovebirds go back to Fang, and Fang allows them to enter the Jade Village, where the Jade Fairies and their queen Selenite is vibing with the Sweet Awakening Gem. They trade their 1x Alabaster Fruit and 1x Blood Ruby for the 1x Sweet Awakening Gem, and they head on back to Joystone to wake the queen up. The Joystone fairies have a happi reunion with Esmeralda, Diamond is still a little bit ":(" about the whole destruction thing
SO WHY DID HE DESTROY THAT STUFF IN THE FIRST PLA--
Tourmaline wakes up like "what year is it", she gets spedrun through the like, week she was eeping, and after she personally thanks the SRU squad for coming in clutch.
And then cool castle party the squad is invited to yay-- wait how the hell are so many people here from so many different corners of the kingdom didn't you just say that you can't leave your hometowns? Is Joystone the exception here is there something that keeps them perfectly fine at Joystone despite being so far from their homes what the hell is this why aren't you explaining anything book I NEED ANSWERS--
Tourmaline and Arbor get to give the shippers something to raise an eyebrow at, the girls have a good time, and the next day they gotta go home. They get a ride back to the crystal elevator, elevator back to the SRU HQ, get surprised by the little photo album the fairies snuck into Will's bag, and then the girls get a ride home, the end.
Wait what about their vacations is Vi still gonna go to Europe to see her parents--
And that's the book. Oh my god where do I begin :D
Now for the rest of this review I'm gonna be addressing the Crystal Kingdom as Cristallia/Crystallia, the world's original Italian name because if you've seen my Geronimo Stilton 101 guide, you would notice that even in that slideshow where I tried to be as objective as possible, I refused to label the world as "Crystal Kingdom" because of how mid it is in comparison -m-
Anyway so this book has so many plot holes that an old road full of potholes looks pristine in comparison.
First of all, the question I asked at the end of the summary. In the book's second chapter, Vi tells her parents something like "hey uh something came up you might end up having to start without me". Then when she gets back to Whale Island, it's like... they just forgor about the summer vacay thing. They were only in Crystallia for like three days and that's in Crystallia time-- we dunno if time in Crystallia runs at the same pace as the real world's time, so like we can just play by Narnia rules and it'd be perfectly fine! They kinda left out how fantasy-to-reality times work anyway, so they're free to just.... do whatever the hell they want with it! It would've been fine! I bet Crystallia has even less restrictions for its timekeeping since it's not magically attached to a real-world country like Erin and Minwa.
Second, for a world about crystals or gemstones, gemstone and crystal lore are very... underutilized in this one. They mentioned this world dabbles in gemstones, stones, and metallurgy, and those names you saw in the summary are the best they could do?? Yeah there is lore stuff for the Stone of the Deep and the Effervescent Emeralds and the Semiprecious Stones Spring and the Amber Twins and Arbor's dagger, but it's all just a buncha nothing. Just stuff about the gem being [insert thing]'s purest essence, which is... eh.
What does that mean? We never find out :D
Then there's....... everything about the plot. Oh my god.
For one, I dunno if this falls under nitpick or not, but the glowy opal or the "light-emitting opal" as it's officially called is.... I don't like how it's used or portrayed here :D For one, why the hell does red immediately mean "WEEWOOWEEWOOWEEWOOWEEWOO" and having it so its faded immediately makes it "WEEWOOWEEWOOWEEWOO"? It's like saying that blue symbolizes errrrhhhhh the ocean and nothing else. Color versatility, people. Colors can mean different things and even have multiple meanings in the same place. Also it's just used as an excuse for the group to have an actual Crystallia infodump at the start, and boy is it the infodump ever.
The origin of the opal is weird, too-- we know that the opal is from Joystone, but how did it end up in the SRU? The SRU barely knows jackshnit about Crystallia, so it couldn't have been a Land of Flowers situation where both parties know each other and are on good terms. The implication is Crystallia's citizens found the crystal elevator and plopped the gemstone in there to send to the SRU, but how did the citizens find it in the first place? How did they know that the elevator was more than just a weird pavilion in the middle of nowhere? What exactly made them trust the SRU despite not knowing anything about them (presumably, the SRU doesn't know much about Crystallia so it's reasonable to assume vice versa)? Were they expecting someone to answer their call for help? How did they get the opal to the damn elevator in the first place with the whole citizens-being-bound-to-their-guard-posts situation? Did they just pass it along all the way to the elevator? If they did, how did that damn blue fish along the Wavy Path finish the chain and put the gem in the elevator??? Why is this world being so trusting of strangers? Aren't they just recovering from a war?
Then there's the meat of the whole thing: the perpetual fetch quest. The girls are literally just... being Crystallia's errand girls. Joystone's fairies couldn't leave Joystone because of the (INCREDIBLY STUPID) bound-to-their-posts thing, so the girls walk on over to consult magical Google Search for them. Then Google search sends them on more fetch quest stuff-- from going to the Eternal Woods for the extra goss, to looking for Goldfire, to the entire last act of the book, which was literally a fetch quest arc. In the wise words of Alice Liddell from American McGee's Alice: Madness Returns,
"Everyone here has an excuse for doing nothing."
(RIP to Alice Asylum btw, my condolences to those in the fanbase)
I don't like the Query Crystal and the Ancient Amber Tree's gimmick in this story-- this is a mystery-solving plot and you're telling me that your solution to the entire plot is consulting magical Google??? For shame, they didn't even make things vague enough to have a bit of unresolved mystery shenanigans like with the Blue Pearl from Treasure of the Sea -m-
It feels like an excuse to send the girls on their way to where the mystery is-- kinda like the massive plot hooks dungeon masters give to their players-- but bro, this ain't a DND campaign, and we readers like to think that we're not stupid :/
Then there's the obligatory puking screaming and crying at friendship prophet moment when... this
Something something the fairies explained to the girls that that's what their effervescent emeralds are capable of, insert Colette making a remark about the Power of Friendship eugh
Well, at least it's not Violet.
Thinking about it more and come to think of it, this entire plot hinges on plot contrivances. A bajillion plot contrivances.
There just so happens to be a maelstrom Vi falls into that just so happens to have one species of fish that can swim in that super-dangerous maelstrom. There just so happens to be 3(637125) gemstones that have a thing for purity or have some pointless lore to them. There just so happens to be a magical gimmick in the world that conveniently prevents the fairies from solving their problems themselves by consulting magic Google. There just so happens to be a magical Google that exists for some reason-- two of them, actually! There just so happens to be a race of evil-coded fairies that captured the dragon so the girls could find him, and a character that just so happens to be friends with everyone.
You prolly get the picture at this point, the entire plot hinges on plot contrivances that are just way too convenient.
There're probably a lotta other things about the plot that my running-on-6-hours-of-sleep ass forgor to mention, but I think I covered most of the bases I wanted to cover sooooooo there you go gwuh
Might make addendums if I wanna add more, but all in all, Crystal Fairies is wasted potential at its finest, and that pisses me off :D
Like c'mon, this is a fantasy world who dealt with a war in their backstory! You'd think they could've leaned into that more or at least hearkened back to it a little more if they were going to reveal it in the briefing before the girls actually get into the adventure itself!! Maybe a little more lore into the evil wizard who attempted to conquer Crystallia or something!!
But nah, they're just throwaway details that never become relevant in the actual story :/
My spite senses are going off so hard with this one istg--
#geronimo stilton#thea stilton#thea sisters#ramble#book rambles#rambles#ramblings#rant#the urge to rewrite this is insane
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Hi im a big fan of your venomous teachings au its incredible and i love it
I was wondering if you could tell us more about kai and Lloyds relationship and (hopefully) brotherly bond
I really like their relationship in cannon and i want to see their relationship after wu is defeated, how kai and lloyd get along, or which ones more protective of the other
I think it would be funny and cute if Lloyd kind of becomes his improtnto caretaker and is the only one who can make kai take care of himself
Like Lloyd will hide all the training gear and wepons, chase kai through the house(or wherever their staying) and tackle him onto a bed and refuse to get up unless he sleeps
Will put plates of food infront of him and will keep staring at him until he takes a bite
He watches kai practice and tricks him by asking questions and tricking him into having breaks and drinking water during sparing matches and practice
I think lloyd would take kai's advice (not the self destructive kind) and use the practice equipment if no ones using it and at one point one of the 3 ninja say he's not strong enough to pracice with them so lloyd challenges him and whipes the floor with them
Kai wouldn't know how to feel when lloyd tells them kai gave him training advice and kept saying that he's amazing
Thank you so much! I'm glad you like the au!
Kai and Lloyd do eventually develop a brotherly bond, but it takes a bit of time after Wu is defeated.
Right after Wu's defeat, they both avoid each other more than anything. Kai's shaken by everything and only really interacts with Nya if he can help it for a bit, and even though he knows they were all under a Spell, Lloyd is still a little freaked out by the ninja.
And then several invitations to the Tournament of Elements arrive.
Lloyd and the ninja are all invited, and I think I'm going to have Garm and Nya get actual invitations as well. They both made very impressive displays' of power while fighting the Great Devourer, and even though Chen doesn't need the Elements/? of Water and Destruction for the Anacondrai transformation spell, he really wants them to use for himself.
Chen still promises something as a reward that the good guys feel is worth the risk (right now I'm thinking it's either false promises of info about either Ray and Maya, or Zanes past, since I don't think Zane would have regained his memories at this point, but I'm still hammering out how things with Dr Julien are gonna go).
Lloyd wasn't actually allowed to go, bc he's 10, but he manages to sneak away anyways, and no-one finds out until he's on the island with everyone else. Bc of this, the good guys all take turns babysitting him. Which leads to some forced bonding with all of the ninja.
Some stuff happens, some people get eliminated, and the ninja are struggling bc some, if not all of them haven't found their True Potential yet. Cole would be the only one who found his before the Tournament if any of them do.
Kai finds his True Potential during the Tournament. In cannon he found it bc he realized he’s supposed to protect the Green Ninja, not be the Green Ninja, and his True Potential in VT is kinda similar.
After finding out the truth about Wu, Kai does start to suspect that him being the Green Ninja was just another one of Wu’s tricks. Finding out his whole life was probably a lie wasn’t good for his already crumbling mental health, and ramped Kai’s imposter syndrome up passed an 11 and towards a 15. He does his best to act like he isn’t in the throws of an existential crisis, and actually does fairly well holding everything in.
And then the airdrop challenge happens. Lloyd came with bc all the contestants were required to join, and there was no way any of the good guys were going to leave him alone in Chen’s trapdoor filled death trap of a mansion.
Things get chaotic, there aren’t enough parachutes for everyone, it’s a real free-for-all. Kai prioritizes getting his remaining allies safe, but Lloyd got separated from everyone. Despite being a prodigious shapeshifter, Lloyd can't focus enough to turn into something that can fly.
The ground’s coming up fast, there’s only one parachute left, and while Kai would be able to get to that parachute, he knows he wouldn't have enough time to get it to Lloyd.
Kai also knows that if he could fully use his powers he could use enough fire to at least slow their fall so they don't splatter all over the jungle floor. His True Potential comes from realizing he doesn't need to be the Green Ninja, he needs to be Kai, even if he isn't entirely sure who Kai really is yet.
He goes for Lloyd, and feels something in him settle into place, and he's able to turn their plummet into a clumsy landing.
Once they land in the jungle, any of Lloyd's reservations about Kai are gone thanks to the rescue, and he thinks that Kai using his fire to fall with style fly is the coolest thing. They wind up sticking together and bonding for pretty much the rest of everything with Chen.
By the end of all the Chen stuff, all of the main cast learn that Lloyd is the true Green Ninja.
There's a small period of peace where Lloyd takes it up on himself to introduce Kai to all of the fun things he missed out on being raised by Wu (comic books, video games, junk food, etc).
And then a call comes from the Museum asking specifically for the Green Ninja.
Despite Lloyd's protests that he should go, Kai answers the call alone. And he comes back possessed.
Lloyd feels incredibly guilty; Morro was after him, but Kai was the one who got possessed. And once everything with Morro and the Preeminent is over, Lloyd makes it his own personal mission to make sure Kai recovers by doing similar things to what you described.
And he's really effective at making sure Kai rests. It's pretty easy to make sure your sleep deprived and sick big brother goes to bed and actually sleeps if you can turn into, like, a bear and carry him to bed, and then turn into a dragon and sit on him like a heated weighted blanket.
#ninjago#lego ninjago#ninjago au#venomous teachings au#ninjago kai#kai ninjago#kai smith#kai jiang#ninjago lloyd#lloyd ninjago#young lloyd#lloyd garmadon#lloyd montgomery garmadon
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fuck it, personal post
spent all of may running around like an insane person - drove to chicago and back for a baby shower, then i flew to san francisco to go to yosemite for a few days, all month work has been on fire bc we're implementing a new softward system/process and it's Not Great, internet friends came to visit for a week which was sAUR fun and sweet but also like......i haven't had true alone time in weeks and now i've spent all weekend by myself and i feel....slightly better i think?
jack antonoff and i have an inside joke and i found two different video angles of it and i cannot stop watching it and listening to the live recording of modern girl they airdropped everyone
i have been to sooo many shows recently and i keep buying tickets for shows?? like after i see all the shows i have tix for, i only need to see like 3 more shows to hit 100 concerts for my all-time list!!!! insane!!!
i watch 9-1-1 now. a new low. (or a high, depending on who you are.)
saw american fiction
it's pride month!!! and i need to get working on my pride tbr but i'm so hung up on masters of death that i ordered it (and love theoretically and TSC) so i can own it
i get a brief break this week - seeing furiosa, gonna go climbing (FINALLY), trying to cook a new recipe - before i have a video shoot next weekend
then i'm driving to chicago for a day the next weekend for a concert
then i'm free briefly again until i go see PARIS PALOMAAAAA (the crowd goes wild)
then i get to see my best friend for fourth of july for her bach!!!!!! then we go home and then we reunite a second weekend in a row for GATBSY IN BOSTON!!!!
i stopped caring about substack momentarily and idk what to do with that
my film better be developed soon because i wanna pick it up saurrrr bad - i got a purple lomo holga roll in there that i desperately want to see turn out (idk if it even will but who cares!!!)
talked to my therapis about PDA (pathological demand avoidance) and it's like the more i learn about autism the more my life makes sense
still working on a bunch of shame tho rip
the bear s3 + TUA4 + queenie (hulu) are coming soon !!!!!
#i feel awesome! i feel awful! i feel everything!!!#summer is shaping up to be insane and i am both excited and exhausted#mainly though i just wanna hang out with my best friends and i can't do that just yet#wedding party in ohio for 4OJ save me#baby queen concert save me#GATSBY IN BOSTON SAVE ME!!!!!#personal
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I wonder... if in the moments of our ups and downs, we look at the stars or the stars look at people!?!... Probably... three years ago, having fallen in love with him, I simply saw the light of a long-extinguished star...
...You know, creating these NFTs a year ago, I decided to do something cute and share with all of you information about various airdrops, trends and directions in NFT art and all the cool hype that was happening with new tokens and cryptocurrencies (esp. on #solanablockchain), but... Fate decreed otherwise...
A few days ago, looking again at all these and other art objects... TBH... I just "couldn’t raise my hand" to delete it all...
... Therefore, I also decided to do something good for all of you... Over these 4 years, I have realized that each of you is a unique person with many hidden and obvious advantages. I believe in you all and hope your dreams come true!...
... Therefore, I decided to release this #NFTcollection, which I hope will bring you all pleasure... (Although I am deeply not sure that any of you still need him)... However, I want to sell it all, pay taxes, deduct money for the creation of this collection, and give the remaining money to charity.... And at the same time, I wanted to do something nice for you all...
+ I remembered the words of my great-grandmother to my mother.... At one time, one of my great-grandmothers (during the revolution) was saved from execution by the poorest relatives, hiding her with them... During her life, she completely changed her name, surname and date of birth three times, but ... despite the difficulties, sorrows and trials (she experienced), she forever remained faithful to the traditions of her country and religion... People melted down several gold family jewelry (which she had saved) into more terrible ones, and she was gradually selling the removed precious stones and bought food and livestock for poor people during the famine... Once in childhood, my mother asked her a question: “why you didn’t keep one of the alexandrites for yourself? as a memory of our family?", and She replied: “The main thing is not what family you came from, but how people will remember you!!!”...
...IF... Any of you wants to become THE ART AGENT for this NFT collection, then... here are my conditions: (as an art agent you will receive) —>
-3% of the transaction of any NFT ART you sell (if NFT ART is sold within 2 year), -7% - if NFT ART is sold within 4 months (*from the date of your participation in it as an art agent), - 10% - if NFT ART is sold within 2 months, -15%- if NFT ART is sold within 2 weeks!
+ if in some incredible way this NFT collection is sold in its entirety within two years, then each of THE ART AGENTS (of this NFT collection) will receive an additional 1% of the entire cost of the NFT collection!!! (I can only take 5 ART AGENTS. I hope for your understanding, all the details you can get here in DMS)
... I will also think about all kinds of bonuses for my subscribers here and bonuses for buyers (a very special bonus for the first buyer, special bonuses for the first 100 wallets and, of course, a nice cashback) + a draw for free NFTs from the bonus collection....
PS. —> The first 5 people who guess the right number of NFTs (created specifically for this video) will receive 1 NFT-art from the bonus collection completely free!!! (3 months after the first few sales of NFT-arts from the main NFT collection) (write me your right answer in DMs here) The number of guessing attempts is 3!!! <—
PS2. —> GIRLS, please DO NOT FALL IN LOVE with the man on my NFT ARTS, because HE does not exist in reality!!! ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓ THIS NFT CHARACTER IS COMPLETELY THE ARTIST'S FANTASY!!! ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓ ANY COINCIDENCES WITH ANY REAL PERSON ARE RANDOM AND UNINTENTIONAL!!! <—
Have a nice day to you all and may God bless you all and your Families. :)
PS3. Well, 🐽, your 🇬🇧 🐨🐨🐨🐨🐨🐨🐨🐨🐨 and other people are right that at least once in your life it will be useful for you to feel like 💼✈!?! https://www.instagram.com/p/C3bIfQdhx8M/
#hiring#artagent#NFT#NFT4charity#NFTart#art#ARTforSale#SALE#ethwetrust or#Lazyminting !?!#whatislove#LOVE#HowToMeasureLOVE#nftcommunity#nftcollector#nftartist#digitalart#crypto#lookingforagent#cryptoart#ethereum#opensea#nftcollectors#blockchain#nftdrop#nftcollectibles#cryptocurrency#bitcoin#foundation#openseanft
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